To Hell and Back: The Day of Resurrection (Part 2)

In finishing this series “To Hell and Back,” I will share the most important point of my year long journey in 2008.  What is that point?  You will have to wait a few sentences.  I know I promised to give, in a self help manner, the truths in walking in your resurrected identity, but this point was recently impressed upon me.  This point is the key to any teaching on walking in your identity in Christ.  How and why did I come to this point?  Fittingly, it started with death.   On the night of July 6th 2009, my dear Uncle Butch murdered my dear Uncle Dennis.  Like Cain and Abel, the murder occurred during an attack fueled by anger.  However, unlike the Bible story, the victim was the instigator.  This story was on the news, in the newspapers, and online back home in Ohio.  I flew home to spend a week with my family, especially my grieving father who is the eldest member of  his family now.  During the course of the week, I began to see a trend.  While many offered condolences, I saw a coldness of heart that ran like a river through the community and through parts of my family.   It upset me and it was not until the Holy Spirit reminded me of the passage in Matthew 24:12 that says,”…the love of many will grow cold,” was my ire calmed.   That passage of scripture pursued me and caused me to examine my own heart.  Then, I came across Psalm 51:17,”The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.“Is my sacrifice worthy? Is my heart broken because of love?  Man, I realized that my heart was marred with cold spots.  And the people who I most loved were not receiving the love that God had placed in me for them.  It seemed that somehow before, during, and after the Great Chasm and Hell Experience that I had stopped expressing love, especially to my family and any person who crossed my path.  It was like they were conditioned in not receiving love from me.  For years, I accused them of not showing me the love I needed from them.  For years, I subscribed to forgetting is forgiving.  For years, I believed that my family did not love me.  The crazy part is that communication frequency and quality gradually dwindled and no one cared to stop it.  As in many families, a seemingly irreversible rift was formed.  This separation caused my perception of love to be distorted.  This deception impacts all relationships especially with God.   So, I pose this question to you, “Is your perception of love distorted?”  The answer to this question impacts how you experience love on all levels.

How's your love?

At the funeral, I could loudly hear the whispers of the Holy Spirit on love.  My Uncle Butch has two sons, Fish and J.J., who are musically gifted just like their father.  J.J., the older and lead musician, brought everyone to tears when he shared how Uncle Dennis was a second father to him and always made everyone feel loved.  That is so true.  All of my memories with Uncle Dennis were marked with love and encouragement.  I spent a lot time with him when I was small through my teen years.  Uncle Dennis was the first person to explain to me what an engineer is and that I should be one because I was gifted in math and science.  I still remember vividly the evening when I went to visit him at grandma’s house.  I was 12 years old and he greeted me at the door, “Hey Nephew, what’s going on?” I smile and enthusiastically share, “I just got my career aptitude test results back. It says I should be an Architect.”  Uncle Dennis smiles and smoothly in his unique way, “Well Chris, because you are so smart and talented you would be a great engineer also.  It was something about the way Uncle Dennis would speak, it was as if God was speaking and you were drawn in because you knew it was important.  When Uncle Dennis said, “I love you.” It was so bathed with the essence of God.  God is love as the Bible says.  Uncle Dennis left love with a lot of people.  So when Fish and J.J. began to sing an original song called, “Joy Always Comes in the Morning,” we felt the strength of God comforting the weak and broken hearts of family and friends.  We were sad at the lose of love.  We lost a man who gave love and we lost an opportunity to give love to him.

Upon further reflection about love, I saw 2008 and before much differently.  The gradual progression of sin in my life that led to the Great Chasm caused me to not express love. The pain and torment of the Hell Experience caused me to become self centered which is the antithesis of love.   In the end, when sin was full blown in death, love was not present.  You cannot genuinely express love and be self centered at the same time.  Love requires you to focus on the other person or people.  Even loving yourself requires you to focus on God so that He can reveal His love to you thereby granting you the power to love yourself.  The turning point for me was when I began to walk in love even when I did not know it.

How do you view love?

There is a passage in Ephesians 3:17-19 that talks about understanding the depth, width, length and height of the love of God. ^“17 that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, ¹⁸ may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— ¹⁹ to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” I paused earlier this year while reading this passage. I understand the width and height as embodied by the cross that Christ bore for us. But the depth and length of His love, who can fully understand?   The depth spans from Heaven to earth through the bowels of Hell.  The length spans space and time in the universe.  God loves us so much.  God hates sin because it keeps us from experiencing His love.  The entire Bible is a long love story about God and His children. Sin was created by Satan because he rejected God love.  So, now Satan has deceived the whole world about the love of God.   Every sin can be attributed to a lack of understanding or deficit of love. That is why Christ said, all of the law can be summed up in two commandments, “Love God and love your neighbor as I have loved you.(John 13:34)“  Christ expressed love selflessly. He said himself, “There is no greater love than he who lays down his life for His friend(John 15:13).“ That is exactly what Christ did when He laid down His life on the cross.  He did that so we might experience the love of God.  Christ knew it was only when a person tastes and is immersed in the love of God can their joy be complete.  That complete joy speaks to a wholeness that only God can give.

Walking in love is the only way you can walk in your resurrected identity in Christ.  Unforgiveness, bitterness, hurt, and anger hinders you from receiving the love of God.  Have you noticed that hurt, unforgiving, bitter, and angry people are self centered and struggle with giving love?  I was the same way.  During my Hell Experience, Great Chasm, and on my road of resurrection, I failed to show love to people whom it especially mattered (e.g. my family and friends).  Yeah, Satan convinced me that they did not deserve my love because of what they had done to me or how they treated other family members.  But that is not what Christ teaches.  Christ spoke to His disciples, Love your enemies.  Even love those who spitefully use you.  Love is proof that you have forgiven someone.  Love and forgiveness were key messages that Christ preached after He was resurrected.  He talked about the retaining of sin when you don’t forgive the sins of others against you.  You cannot be who God has designed you to be when you are holding on to unforgiveness and not receiving the love of God.  As a result, you cannot complete the great commission which is to preach the gospel and reconcile all nations to God.  Your identity, purpose, and life as a believer must have the DNA of reconciling the lost to God through the love that He puts in you.

The path of resurrection in 2008 began with love for God and ended with love for people.  I spent the first six months of my journey learning to love God again.  The byproduct of loving God was a renewed love of self.  Low self esteem is caused by a low esteem for God.  Low esteem for God means you honor the words of Satan more than His word.  If you have some personal hang up or insecurity or shame that makes you feel bad, somewhere in your belief system you have esteemed the words of Satan more than God.  It is so subtle at times that you make think it is normal by now.  God loves you so much.  No matter what state you are in, be it physical, spiritual, emotional, or circumstantial, God loves you and never condemns you.  Once, I began to esteem His words again and to live by them. He began to build my self confidence.  Self confidence based on the word of God is like the house built on the rock that Jesus spoke of in Matthew 7:24. Self confidence based upon empty words, attention, anything man-made, or of the world’s system sets you up for disaster is like building your house on sand (Matthew 7:26).  You know, God me stripped of anything that I garnered pride or self confidence from.  On December 30th, 2008, God instructed me to move out of my beautiful house and rent it out completely furnished, and take only my clothing and books.  Within six weeks of receiving those instructions, I went from a plush 4 bedroom 3 bath home with a two car garage, to a 1 room shared bathroom in a boarding house with four other college students.   The Lord forbade me from purchasing furniture to recreate my former “comfort” level.  I slept on a borrowed mattress.  God showed me that my identity was tied to my house and material possessions.  Even my wardrobe was changed.  He instructed me to leave the blazers, hats, shoes, and other apparel that I used to fill voids in my identity.  I felt like Jesus when the Roman soldiers stripped Him of his clothes and cast lots for them.  After the stripping of material possessions, God stripped me of relationships that I was using to fill the void of attention.  God showed me a love for the world expressed through receiving attention from women.  This also would manifest in the ambitious pursuits i.e. success breeds attention. I had to cut off relationships with women that were sources of attention and not the love of God.  Others I had to pray over and confess the void that woman was filling in my life.  Through this obedience, God showed me a fear of being unloved. Thereafter, I battled loneliness.  The many voids left from cutting off the relationships exposed a cold draft in my soul.  I discovered a cold, hurt, and scarred heart.  Every exposed void, to the glory of God, has been bathed with His love through His word, spirit, and Blood.  And finally, an ability to love people was resurrected. What is filling your voids where God’s love must dwell?

1 John 2:3-11 talks about the evidence of being a child of God is love for God and people.  Loving God causes you to obey His word and to love the people He created.  At the end of your the Day of Resurrection, it all about love.  It was love that resurrected Jesus.  It was love that resurrected me.  It was love that God put in the hearts of people assigned to my life during 2008.  It was love that caused a friend to help clean my messy office in the same manner God used her to clean up my messy my heart.  Therefore, in closing, I leave you a prayer for love, faith, and hope to be resurrected in your life. 1 Corinthians 13 ends with a message connecting identity to love, faith, and hope. ” ¹² For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known. ¹³ And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love. ” If you are hurt, are having a hard time obeying God’s word, sharing love with family, friends, or strangers, then this prayer is God’s helping hand being extended to you.

Love Resurrected

Dear God, where two or three are gathered, there you are in the midst. Right now, in the name of Jesus, I gather, touch, and agree with my brother or sister who is reading this blog.  I pray, in the name of Jesus, that their hearts are healed of every wound, offense, affliction, wrong, and hurt that is keeping them from loving You, themselves, and others, especially those who have hurt them.  Right now, I ask You to give them power to forgive ever sin committed against them and to forgive them of every sin they’ve committed.  I pray specifically for sexual abuse.  Every person abused at the hands of a loved one, pastor, preacher, friend, stranger, or relative, may the power of God touch it in the name of Jesus.  Jehovah Raphe, break the chains of bondage because of that offense and bring healing and restoration to the areas of love afflicted by that abuse.  Lord, I cast down every condemning spirit that resurrects the memory and mental anguish of that experience and order it to be released by the blood of Jesus.  Right now, I speak wholeness according to 2 Corinthians 5:17 which says, that we are new creatures in Christ and old things have passed away. Lord, I speak to every wedge that has been driven between your child and your love.  I speak to offenses, negative words, negligent parents, abrasive spouses, failed business, financial set backs, job losses, death of loved ones, broken relationships, failed marriages, and every situation that Satan has used to distort your love.  God, I pray that their spiritual eyes of understanding be enlightened in the name of Jesus.  Lord, shed light on every lie that is distorting your love.  The veil of Satan be rebuked in the name of Jesus.  God, may your Spirit move now on every dark situation. Let there be love in the hearts of your people, right now, in the name of Jesus.  Fill them, right now, with love.  Seal them Holy spirit with your love.  Bathe them in the loving blood of Jesus.  Love cry out from their souls.  Deaf and mute spirit, be rebuked.  May they now hear Your voice of love.  May now feel Your presence of love.  God, heal the broken hearts.  God, heal the open wounds.  God, yield a refreshing spirit to your precious child.  Open now the flood gates of heaven.  Flow the blessings of a revelation and relationship with Your love.  Show them the depth, width, height, and length of Your love.  Do this, in your precious Son’s name, Amen.

If there are any unbelievers or those out of fellowship with God reading this, I pray you receive the love of God through a committed and consistent relationship with Jesus Christ.  All you have to do is to confess your sins, acknowledge Jesus Christ as the Son of God who died and was resurrected for your sins, and believe this truth in your heart.  Say aloud, “Lord Jesus the Christ, I confess that I am a sinner in need of cleansing.  I need you to wash me with your Blood which shed for me in death.  Lord Jesus, I believe You did die and was resurrected on the third day for my sins.  Right now, I believe you are the Savior Son of God.  Right now, my sins are given.  I am bathed with your Blood and am acceptable before You.  Right now, every generational curse is broken because my inheritance comes from You and You alone.  Right now, I forgive every person who has sinned against me.  I commit to loving them no matter what.God, I rejoice with You as Heaven is rejoicing for me.  Lord, give me your Holy Spirit so that I might learn Your ways and live like Jesus.  Lord, lead me to a church home where I can grow in the knowledge of your love, wisdom, and ways.  Lord, show me my divine purpose in You.  Give me the strength to walk it out.  In Jesus mighty name, Amen!”

And finally, I pray for hope for those who feel hopeless.  Lord, we  take authority over every situation and declare that what was intended for evil, You will use for good. We believe and confess that no weapon of a situation, relationship, person, or ailment shall prosper.  Right now, God we ask for faith to overcome this situation.  Greater is You in me than he that is in the world. God you have already conquered this situation in the name of Jesus.  I pray now for wisdom, guidance, and supernatural faith.  I pray you release your ministering angels to complete Your will. Lord I thank you for the victory.  Lord, I praise you for your glory to be revealed in this situaiton.  I thank you in Jesus name, Amen.

Keep fighting for your dream!